E3 is nearly upon us, which means our minds are dangerously close to shattering from the strain of containing so many possibilities. What will be announced? What won’t? Will Geoff Keighley bring Alf back to talk about Hatsune Miku at Summer Game Fest? These are the important questions causing us dangerous levels of psychic load.
Here are the PC Gamer team’s predictions for E3 2021, from surprise tattoos to Sony exclusives to whatever Hideo Kojima’s cooking up next. Count on at least one* of them coming true. *ᴾᵒᵗᵉⁿᵗᶦᵃˡˡʸ ˡᵉˢˢ ᵗʰᵃⁿ ᵒⁿᵉ
This is a longshot. We all know The Elder Scrolls 6 is still years away. Starfield is the priority for Bethesda and it’s already been teased by Microsoft that it’ll be at the show. The only reason we even got the initial Elder Scrolls 6 tease back in 2018 was that people were miffed that Fallout 76 was a multiplayer game and Bethesda wanted to show us it’s still into singleplayer RPGs.
But let’s say you’re Microsoft. You’ve just spent $9 billion buying Zenimax. You want to show how cool your new purchase is to everyone. Yeah, a trailer for Starfield is a good way to get people excited. But if you want to bring down the house, you gotta show some Elder Scrolls 6. You have to! It’s been three entire years since a 10 second video of a fake mountain made the crowd go wild. You barely have to make an effort. All you need is a little bit more scenery, some music, an actual title, and a release year.
You spent $9 billion so you might as well win E3 with a 15 second teaser. Just give us a taste. It’ll hold us over for another 3 years. —Christopher Livingston
Read more about what to expect from Microsoft + Bethesda’s press conference.
Epic and Sony announce exclusive partnership for PlayStation games on PC
Bit of a no-brainer this one. Sony likes cash, and it certainly likes what it’s seen so far of its games on PC, and PC players clearly want these games. Epic has cash, so much cash that even Tim Sweeney can’t face buying another golden yacht. If it wants to use that cash to drive players to the Epic store with big exclusives, here’s a ready-made slate of genuinely great games. —Rich Stanton
Phil Spencer will reveal a Halo Infinite tattoo, Peter Moore style
Probably not, but I can dream. Instead, Microsoft will probably just show us a new and improved Halo Infinite trailer, with fewer blurry-looking textures and goofy-looking shots of gawping Covenant guys. My guess: Last year’s ridicule of Halo Infinite is supplanted by the idea that it’s a cheesy-ass Halo game for people who truly understand the series. And that idea might be right. Phil, though, do the tattoo thing, seriously. Big applause. Well, virtual applause. —Tyler Wilde
CDPR officially cancels Cyberpunk 2077 multiplayer, makes all DLC free, and announces the Witcher 4
CDPR desperately needs a win, something to start repairing its fractured relationship with consumers and the promise of a brighter future. It should be obvious to everyone now that Cyberpunk 2077’s multiplayer, always something of a pipe dream, should simply be abandoned. If this goes hand-in-hand with the promise of ongoing Cyberpunk development, and some sort of sweetener in the form of free DLC for players who bought the game, say, in the first year, then that would be a start.
The obvious ace up the studio’s sleeve is The Witcher 4. This series is why everyone loved CDPR and had such high hopes for Cyberpunk 2077, and just the knowledge it’s returning to that world would go a long way to consoling those players who still feel burned. —Rich Stanton
Psychonauts 2 will surprise release at E3 on Xbox Game Pass
You can feel it too, right—how very possible this feels? Double Fine has been happy to take its time on Psychonauts 2’s final development years since the studio was acquired by Microsoft in 2019. We know the game is aiming for 2021 and recent Game Informer coverage suggests it’s near the finish line. What if I told you Psychonauts 2 is even more done than Microsoft wants us to think and actually plans to surprise release the game during its E3 showcase? The thought of it makes me grin, so evidence of an August release date be damned, I’m staying hopeful for this one. —Morgan Park
It’s been five years since Firaxis Games’ very good turn-based strategy game. Last year’s XCOM: Chimera Squad may have given a glimpse of new systems and mechanics that could be expanded on, from a bite-sized alien SWAT team game into a sci-fi epic of procedurally generated hijinks with custom soldiers wearing hot pants. I need it. —Jorge Jimenez
Hideo Kojima announces Death Stranding 2, world panics
“Following the events of the first game,” says Mr Kojima, “Sam and BB have returned to a world that is now flooded and, much like the classic Kevin Costner movie Waterworld, we must find our sense of community once more through bartering from rafts.”
Shortly after the announcement is made there’s a run on boats, the US government urgently commits to a review of flood defences, and the stock market panics as an NFT featuring Kojima eating a sausage and looking wistfully at the sea sells for over a hundred million. Geoff Keighley says this looks like the future of videogames, wow man, hey what did you guys think, as the waves begin to lap at his exquisitely expensive sneakers and the feed cuts to black. —Rich Stanton
Sony will announce a PS5 update for Bloodborne and I still won’t be able to play it on my damn PC
There have long been rumors about a Bloodborne PC port, but so far they’ve amounted to absolutely nothing. I expect that to continue, and for Sony to pour salt in the wound by announcing an updated 4K, 60 fps version of the game for the PS5 even though they don’t have an E3 event. It will look fabulous, and they’ll be doing it specifically to hurt us. —Wes Fenlon
Geoff Keighley gets Alf to finally show us what it looks like when he eats a cat
We’re waiting, Geoff. — James Davenport
EA says it’s getting a bit bored of making FIFA now
“I’ve been working on ball physics for 15 years” croaks a bearded man as the hype video for the latest FIFA begins to roll… but no! EA CEO Andrew Wilson appears, his usual frozen toothpaste grin now a grimace. “Look, truth is, we kind of got it right years ago and have just been fiddling with the edges ever since. I thought we could do it forever but now I’ve got three Lamborghinis, all of our former senior leads are in padded cells muttering about dynamic limb interaction, and all you do anyway is play the damn card game. FIFA 22 is a ball. That’s right, it’s a literal branded football for $70. Get off your asses huh.” —Rich Stanton
Beyond Good & Evil 2 reemerges with a comically short demo
Waiting for this long-awaited sequel is starting to feel like a lost cause (congrats if you’ve kept the faith for this long). Ubisoft recently confirmed that the game is still in development, but it sounds like it’s still years away. Its lofty open universe pitch drew uncomfortable comparisons to the exaggerated hype of pre-release No Man’s Sky, so much that I’m skeptical of how much the final product (if it happens) will resemble that fancy animated trailer from E3 2017. —Morgan Park
Read more about what to expect from Ubisoft’s E3 press conference.
Look, I’m just resigned to it by now okay. —Rich Stanton
I still believe, Rich. —Jorge Jimenez