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How far can you get being pious and just in Crusader Kings 3?



PC Gamer magazine

(Image credit: Future)

This diary first run in PC Gamer magazine issues 351 and 352. We do one every month, taking on new challenges and approaching our favourite games from entirely new angles—and letting you know how we got on.

Yes, yes, I know, I know. Crusader Kings 3 is a game that practically begs you to be cruel, self-serving and just generally evil. But I’m going to lean hard into the alternate history angle, and try to avoid falling over. What if, unlike the real medieval leaders, I really was a king that had everybody else’s best interests at heart? Was all that aggression and backstabbing really necessary in the grand scheme of things? Can’t we all just get along? 

I decide to jump into the Anglo-Saxon shoes of King Harold II. Taking stock of my situation, I realise that I haven’t exactly made things easy for myself. I’m already at war with both King Harald IV, and Duke William II ‘the Bastard’. In terms of family, my parents had eight children including me, because Netflix hasn’t been invented yet. My brother Tostig hates me so much that he’s my nemesis. He’s clearly far beyond my powers of persuasion, which makes me very sad. 

My mother, I’m shocked to find, has a slightly negative opinion of me. I don’t have this problem with my dad although this is, admittedly, because he’s dead. What to do? I turn to the church’s teachings, something that I’ll be doing a lot of in my mission to be pious and just. It’s right there in the ten commandments, innit? Honour thy father and thy mother. So I honour her with some cash, and thankfully, she’s shallow enough for this to make her (very slightly) love me again.

(Image credit: Paradox Interactive)

I’m under attack from powerful armies, I’m living in a world of greedy, violent monarchs, and I want to be sure that I always make noble decisions. I need God on my side. Therefore, I go for a Learning lifestyle, and start building up the Theology tree straight away. Next, I check out my relationship with the pope, Robin to God’s Batman. He has a very slightly negative opinion of me. That won’t do at all! I start a scheme to sway him, hoping to help him appreciate my many lovely qualities.

God morning Britain

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