A lot of people are behind President-elect Joe Biden and Vice President-elect Kamala Harris’ historic White House victory — campaign workers, volunteers, and millions of voters. But there is also one Thing behind the Biden-Harris triumph, and that Thing is Gritty.
In the days leading up to Nov. 3, the official mascot for the NHL’s Philadelphia Flyers-turned-internet’s beloved goblin son became a symbol of the importance Pennsylvania played in the 2020 presidential election. We prayed to him, we worshipped him, we asked him for deliverance.
Now that Pennsylvania has gone blue and the Biden-Harris campaign has claimed victory, of course, we must give Gritty what Gritty is due — and the internet has suggestions.
There’s the obvious option: get Gritty into politics where Gritty belongs.
In Gritty’s short two years on this planet, the orange google-eyed creature has become an emblem of progressive change. Gritty could easily make a positive impact in any number of federal departments as a cabinet member.
by law this means gritty is commerce secretary
— Gabriel Debenedetti (@gdebenedetti) November 6, 2020
Still, Gritty should get a Cabinet position or something
— scooterb23 (@scooterb23) November 7, 2020
Another person suggested Gritty be allowed to serve as interim president — which for sure won’t fly (Gritty is a two-year-old!) but would still be a fairly solid option given the circumstances we’re left in until Jan. 20. Someone else recommended replacing all confederate statues with shrines to Gritty’s greatness, which yes.
You think anyone will notice if we …. you know … take Donald out, put Gritty in to the White House for 75 days?
— Shubhangi Karmakar (@Repealist_) November 7, 2020
Can’t wait for all the confederate statues to be replaced by Gritty
— jesk, ghost of a human man (@_glavinder) November 7, 2020
Or we could put Gritty on the $20 bill and make this dude really happy.
And then there’s this suggestion, which is surprisingly graphic and common.
If PA flips first Gritty should be allowed to personally drag Trump from the White House and throw him directly into hell.
— James D’Amato (@OneShotRPG) November 6, 2020
Or we could just get Gritty a drink.
People who should not have to buy their own drinks this weekend:
— Sam Sanders (@samsanders) November 6, 2020
All hail, Gritty. Long live, Gritty. Liberté, Egalité, Gritté.